1. |
My Next Cigarette Burn
04:05
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You watched me age 19, bury my dad
And you asked for his permission to become my wife, the day before he died
And he’ll never know my next lover
No he’ll never know my next lover
No he’ll never know my next lover
Coffee and cigarettes back when I took part in neither, too young to understand but look at me now
Pinot in a can in one hand, cigarette in the other
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you, lover
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you, lover
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you
And I don’t want to deal with death
I don’t want to shake his hand anymore
He took you from me way too soon
And I don’t want to deal with death
And when did you fall out of love
Do you remember the first time you looked at me
And didn’t feel anything
Did it happen overnight or did it slowly seep in
Coffee and cigarettes back when I took part in neither, too young to truly understand but look at me now
Pinot in a can in one hand, cigarette in the other
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you, lover
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you
They both left a scar, but that hurt less than you
And they both left a scar, but that hurt less than you
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2. |
Sculptor
03:10
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And you’ll all sigh with relief
When I’m buried beneath
Chipping away at time, slowly but with force
Making a sculpture of who I once was
I don’t think she lives in me anymore
But I’m desperately trying to get her back
But with every crack, what’s underneath is coming to light and it’s a darkness which I cannot fight
And you’ll all sigh with relief
When I’m buried beneath
Don’t visit me there, save your grief
For someone more deserving of it
More deserving of it
Don’t visit me in your dreams, save your sleep
For someone more deserving of it
More deserving of it
Don’t visit me there, save your grief
For someone more deserving of it
More deserving of it
Don’t visit me in your dreams, save your sleep
For someone more deserving of it
More deserving of it
And you’ll all sigh with relief
When I’m buried beneath
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3. |
I'll Die As I Lived
02:04
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It’s not poetic I’m just in pain
And pen to paper for a little while quietens the hurricane
But I can’t escape from me, the eye of the storm
My body is weathered, bruised and torn
My aching ribs can no longer protect my heart from the immeasurable pain
Ultimately I’ll die as I lived terrified and trapped in a cage
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4. |
Blisters
03:17
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I’m sick of bandages, and blood on the carpet
There’s so many cracks and they’re widening
I’m watching myself become everything I said I’d never be
I feel so defeated, serotonin depleted
Every bone aching, I don’t think I’ll make it
I’m so nauseous, I’m breaking
I’m covered in blisters, that won’t heal
I don’t think I can take it anymore
I’m so sorry I don’t think I can take it anymore
I’m so sorry I don’t think I can take it anymore
I feel so defeated, serotonin depleted
Every bone aching, I don’t think I’ll make it
Every bone aching, I don’t think that I will make it
Every bone aching, I don’t think that I will make it
I’m covered in blisters, that won’t heal
I’m covered in blisters, that won’t heal
I don’t think I can take it anymore
I don’t think I can take it anymore
I’m sick of bandages, and blood on the carpet
There’s so many cracks and they’re widening
I’m watching myself become everything I said I’d never be
I’m covered in blisters that won’t heal
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5. |
Broken Soul
03:31
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Maybe I’m not designed to be anything but another heart to break
Because it keeps being broken over and over again
And I keep trying to cling on and patch one hole
While bleeding out of another
It’s all a mess and it’s not one I can keep trying to clean up
I keep slipping in my own blood that just won’t dry
Maybe it’s all a balancing act, but I’m no flamingo
I’m a broken soul, ready to go where broken souls go
I’m a broken soul, ready to go where broken souls go
I said I wouldn’t go with words left in me
But i think the pain outweighs any art I could ever create
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6. |
The Void
03:06
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There are so many signs I’m slipping, but I feel like I’m screaming and banging on this glass that surrounds me that no one else can see, and they can’t hear me but I’m getting further and further away
And I fear I’m falling down, down into the dirt
And they won’t hear my frantic, terrified calls for help
And I’ll keep on
falling down until I can’t make it back
And they’ll be looking for the signs
That tell them what I lacked
And I don’t know how to stop the burning in my blood
And I don’t know how to put out the flames that spread through my brain
And I don’t know how I stay, when I can’t catch my breath for long enough
And I don’t know how I stay, when I can’t catch my breath for long enough to say
Long enough to say, I don’t think I’ll be okay
The poison in my mind, Is quickly spreading through my veins
And the part of me that wants to stay
Isn’t strong enough to wait
For a solution that doesn’t end in this way
But the rope is calling my name
And I can’t look away
And I don’t know how to stop the burning in my blood
And I don’t know how to put out the flames that spread through my brain
And I don’t know how I stay, when I can’t catch my breath for long enough
And I don’t know how I stay, when I can’t catch my breath for long enough to say
Long enough to say, I don’t think I’ll be okay
I don’t think I’ll be okay
I know I won’t be okay
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7. |
Heartless
01:56
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I guess people fall out of love, I wish I knew how
Because you left and I was left broken apart
No more metaphorical heart surgery, take the whole thing out
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8. |
||||
I’ve started crossing the road with my eyes shut again, I’ll take that as a sign that I’m not doing too well
I’ve started smoking again, trying not to put them out on my arm
There’s already so much smoke in my chest
And fire in my lungs
So what’s another one?
I haven’t breathed easy for a while now
The cold keeps sleeping in
And I’m struggling to keep warm
Even on summer evenings
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
I've not
I’ve been drinking again, making myself more unwell
It numbs the pain and helps for a little while
There’s already so much scarring on my liver
And pain in my chest
So what’s another one?
I wish I’d disappear in this cloud of smoke
That covers my face
Because I don’t recognise myself when I’m not self-destructing
It’s all I’ve known, for so long and happiness has never been a friend of mine
I wish I’d disappear in this cloud of smoke
That covers my face
Because I don’t recognise myself when I’m not self-destructing
It’s all I’ve known, for so long and happiness has never been a friend of mine
I won’t reach out because I’m sick of being a tornado, destroying everyone in my path
I don’t mean to but I’m a bomb that’s meant to go off and everything will be better when it finally does
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
Can't you tell?
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
I've not been doing too well
Can't you tell?
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Wilted Flower Nottingham, UK
Notts based emo folk duo
Micki combines haunting, powerful vocals with heart-wrenching lyrics focusing on mental health, love & loss
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